I Hear A Calling

I have ruminated over this entry for weeks now. I wanted to write about myself but that’s a somewhat untouched subject for me. I always write about things, not about me. I feel vulnerable and like this is a big risk. 

I talked to Dana about how I felt writing about myself and she said “just write it, say exactly what you just said and just write.”  That made me feel better but not completely confident.

My question to Dana was “but doesn’t everyone feel the same?”  Her answer was NO!  Not everyone feels that same way so you have to write it.

Since I was young, I felt a strong sense of calling.  I thought everyone did.  Didn’t everyone have a calling to be a strong leader, to influence others, and to find the giftedness in others and help make it into something great?  Doesn’t everyone awaken at night with ideas of how to do these things?  Isn’t everyone like me?

Dana says NO!  The older I get the more I realize she’s correct.  Not everyone feels driven like I feel. Not everyone believes in the inherent giftedness of others, and not everyone works daily to sharpen themselves, in order to be ready for action.

I just thought everyone had the same drive.  I should have clued in when, each new year’s day I ask Ray things like “what did you learn in the past year and what are you going to accomplish in the upcoming year?”  Ray:  blank stare.  He is sometimes forced to treat me like the overly excited puppy that I can be-scolding me to sit when I can hardly stop jumping up and down.  “I do not have any goals Libby” he replies.  WHAT?!?  How can that be I exclaim?  This coming after I’ve spent weeks preparing my end of year reflection and beginning to think about my new year’s challenges and goals.

How can you NOT be preparing for the new year? How can you NOT be setting goals and readying to refine yourself more?  Well, that’s just the way it is for some folks.  It is ok to not feel the drive-God gifts in different ways.  He simply gives me a drive.  He compels me to share my gifts freely and to constantly sharpen those gifts.  Not everyone is as “out there” as I tend to be and that’s ok.

So to those who feel the call-who have a “knowing” that there is a higher calling for them, I know how you feel.  For those who feel “special” as I’ve felt, you are!  It is ok to feel called upon to do great work. It is ok to feel a burden for the work that must get done. And to feel the weight of serving as an example and a light in this world-I bow to you. I greet the divine in you and ask that you greet the divine in me.

Blessings to us all-because it takes us all. Each one has a purpose to fulfill and each one is uniquely gifted.  What a joy and what a calling.  It is an honor to respond.

This brief poem came from d365.org's daily devotional on 1-29-13
May your gifts burn like a fire,
Bringing warmth to everyone you meet.
May your gifts light the world
And reveal the goodness of God.
May your gifts today be embraced
And expressed
With creativity,
Making you useful in God's mercy.

Thinking About My One Little Word

Journey

Really this life is a process by which day-by-day we are on this journey. Acknowledging the small things is the recognition of the Big Thing.  It is hearing the birds chiping while you are putting your make up on, smelling the scent of fresh air while you check your email in the afternoon, and feeling fresh laundry dried on the line that makes the difference between a life of gratitude and a life of numbness.

Pursuit

I will pursue my goals with passion.  I get excited.  I tell everyone about my new thing.  I move from one new adventure to another. Usually through books.  I love learning new things, I love pursuing knowledge.  I love!

Search

I will discover the unknown.  The unkown in me and the unknown outside of me. Both hold amazing understanding and knowledge.  I enjoy the discovery. The Lord leads me in my quest for new knowledge.

Expedition

Trek

Sometimes it gets laborious. Sometimes it is arduous. Sometimes I get tired.  I just give myself permission to step aside and rest, then continue the quest, continue the journey.

Odyssey

Adventure

Exciting and new.  Beginning and full of energy.

Exploration

A deeper level.  Understanding. Digging deep.  Sometimes holding your breath. Sometimes exhaling. The exploration is the quest, the desire, the seeking.

search

Seeking.  Wanting.  More, needing to know more, to fully embrace, fully understand, fully be.

crusade

Carrying the banner.  Wanting everyone to know.  Announcing the new.  Stimulating the desire to know more, telling others, being the catalyst.

mission

Must carry on. 

pilgrimage

Recurring dedication.  Must carry on.  

Each month I am going to experience my word in a different way.  Here is a list to get me started:

journey

pursuit

search

expedition

trek

odyssey

adventure

exploration

search 

crusade

mission 

pilgrimage

One Little Word for 2013

quest

Waiting and Anticipation, Part II

For most of my life I viewed waiting as a bad thing.  I had the perspective of waiting or anticipation as a negative time when nothing was happening.  In studying God’s word though, I’m beginning to realize that waiting can be an active and joyful time.  In the time of waiting God is usually very busy.  Rarely do our lives happen in isolation but rather when we pass through life we often intersect the lives of others.  Our smile could mean the difference in a person’s perception of a good day.  Our speaking the truth in love might be the difference in a substantial decision for someone. And our plans are often fulfilled through others.  So the Lord is often involved in fulfilling the plan for our lives even when we think nothing is going on.  It might be, like the birth of the Messiah, that a child is being born and growing in order to fulfill a mission that impacts our lives.

 

I also used to believe that a time of waiting had to be filled with worry.  Now I’m learning what a waste of energy worry is.  Philippians 4:19 (The Message) says: 

 

And now I have it all—and keep getting more! The gifts you sent with Epaphroditus were more than enough, like a sweet-smelling sacrifice roasting on the altar, filling the air with fragrance, pleasing God no end. You can be sure that God will take care of everything you need, his generosity exceeding even yours in the glory that pours from Jesus. Our God and Father abounds in glory that just pours out into eternity. Yes.

 

Or the NRSV version:

And my God will fully satisfy every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

 

Now, Jesus is a rich, rich person.  Jesus will fulfill my needs based on those riches.  Why worry then?  The outcome is already prescribed-I don’t need to be consumed with worry and negativity.  My only job is to love the Lord and love my fellow beings, the Lord will take care of the rest.  No need to use the giftedness that God has given me in negative or wasteful ways.  Rather be active in praising and pleasing the Lord.  Don’t let the time of waiting be a time of waste.  Be involved, be thankful, full of gratitude because the Lord is active and so pleased you are his creation. He loves me and he loves you so get involved in what He is doing and be ready for your blessing!

Waiting and Anticipation

As the holiday season came into focus this year I made a note to be more intentional with my state of mind and state of heart.  I read and reread the story of the expectancy of Christ’s birth and thought a good deal about how the national of Israel must have felt as they waited for their Messiah.

 

With a history of enslavement, abuse, and lose of direction it must have been challenging to wait with expectancy year after year for their rescue.  So often today we get so routine with our prayers, with our worship, and with our adoration. We go through the motions but does it change us?  Does it help us love God and love others more?  The chosen people of Israel knew their Messiah would come but year after year they waited.  The prayers may have become just words to be repeated out of obligation but I would like to think that there were some in the nation of Israel who felt that little tickle of magic when they thought of the birth of their Messiah.  How wonderful to have the people fully reunited to God. How magical to have the God of the Universe connected to the people again.

 

Today, over two thousand years later we Christians would be well-served to re-ignite that magic, that shimmer of anticipation as we now await the return of the Messiah.  Let us not fall into routine.  Let us not recite prayers as rote words.  Let the words soak into the very fiber of our beings.  Let our requests change us. Let the flame be fanned into a raging fire of love for God and love for others.

 

Psalm 27:14 says (The Message) 13-14:  I’m sure now I’ll see God’s goodness in the exuberant earth. Stay with God! Take heart. Don’t quit. I’ll say it again: Stay with God.

 

New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)¹⁴ Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

 

Just as David felt when writing this passage, we must wait.  We should be intentional and ever dedicated to keeping that hopeful stance.  Every day the Lord meets us with new blessings.  Our blessings begin new every day and let us take a mindset of gratitude.  Let the love renew your heart and recharge you.  Let your passions swell and your mind be renewed.