Writing for my Soul

I believe writing (long-hand, in a journal) is an essential, dare I say, critical tool one MUST engage in, in order to have true growth in life.

I have been a journal-er for years.  I derive so much from long-handed writing that I literally, in 2013-2014 did my entire doctoral dissertation in writing before typing it up.  When changes were needed, I wrote them as well then edited my original document.

I find the process of writing deeply revealing.  Information which has never come into your mind is suddenly appearing on the pages as you allow it to siphone from your brain to the paper with no filters.

I believe daily writing (in the morning because you are still in the spirit of shaping your day) connects you to the world.  I’ve discovered my deep love of certain things in the world around me through allowing my pen to float along the page as I think about general happenings.  I have solidified political stances and changed my mind as I presented my arguments to myself.  Writing connects us deeply into our world.

Writing nudges us to remember and connects us with our deepest longing.  Years into my current career I answered the question “when you were a child playing, what game or scenario was your favorite?”  I knew the answer immediately!  TEACHING!  But further still I loved making worksheets, guided learning papers, and test which I required my poor cousin to complete.

When I realized this, I didn’t immediately quite my job in order to teach, but I do look for ways each week which allow me to have a little time writing which also makes my heart sing.

Frederick Bueckner, noted theologian, said “where our greatest passion meets the world’s greatest needs, there we find our vocation.”

Through exploring oneself slowly and intentionally one may just find vocation and much clarity.

Writing allows passions to rise and the clarity to either know to stoke the flame or let it burn out.

Often when we are upset about something, a personal slight, a rude customer, or we are just having a bad day, we can let it rip in our journal.  We can scream using ALL CAPS and exclamation points !!!!!!!!! and this allows us to et it out of our system without another human being having to survive our emotion tsunami.

By the same experience, we may realize that we have had a life-long love for gardening and decide to experiment with setting up apartment gardens for assisted-living apartments.  With pen in hand, we may learn how to fan the flame from spark to roaring fire.

Writing, I have found, soothes my soul and connects me with Spirit by being blessed with self-understanding, direction, and intention.

May writing benefit you greatly as well.

Heart-Centered Work

I was reading a note from someone who is self-employed.  She made mention of loving her work in a heart-centered environment.  This description made me think about heart-centeredness in the work environment.

Of course being self-employed with work that allows you to pour from your soul has its benefits such as you can set your own hours and not be required to drag yourself into the office if you don’t want to do so.

Another perk of heart-centered self-employment—you are not subject to the whims of a moody boss.  However you are subject to the whims of the moody self!

While heart-centered self-employment allows for nimble response to stakeholders, there is also no buffer against certain things which employment in a larger organization allows for more insulation.

In short though—doesn’t heart-centered work sound attractive to most of us?  Wouldn’t it be fair to say that doing work that makes your heart sing is possible in self-employment as well as organizational employment?

It might be that workers are even able to focus on core values or organizational vision to center themselves if they have to endure a short-term difficulty.

Here are thoughts about being heart-centered regardless of the organizational structure.

1.      Do any of your weekly tasks/meetings/projects fill you with energy and happiness?

2.     Do you recognize a greater good even when completing a task/meeting/project that is not your favorite?

3.     Can you see yourself doing this work in various organizational structures?

I encourage you to delve into these questions and think about your values.  It is worthy to think we might all find heart-centered work regardless of the structure we function in daily.

May your work make your heart sing!

“In Defense of Spirituality (With or Without Religion)”

I read an excellent article today by Tina Rowley entitled “In Defense of Spirituality (With or Without Religion).”  Ms. Rowley wrote,

I’m tired.  Carl, everybody—I’m tired.  I’m tired of feeling like I should be ashamed of my spiritual orientation…I’m tired of my own fear.  It’s time to speak up for myself and for anyone else who’s been tip toeing around, keeping their spiritual orientation a secret for fear of ridicule.  Enough is enough.

Wow!  What a powerful stance.  It’s one of those statements which one person simply stands up.  Then a second, quietly follows.  Then a third until hundreds form a sea of solidarity.  Count me in!

Tina Rowley you are a quiet revolutionary and you captured my mind, heart, and soul.  For far too long we’ve sat silently at the table as the banter escalated.  We retreated, thought about it, and returned.  Now it is time to simply state “I have something to say” and then confidently interject our reason and resolute perspectives.

We have answers, we have questions, but most of all we have a voice.  So friends, stop your chaos, inhale, hold on to that breath, claim it as yours, then allow it to release from your body, tides of stress, anxiety, and attitude.  Let it melt away.  Your core is safe, it is solid, and you may put your fists down.  Put them by your side and release the tension.  There is another way.  Not right.  Not wrong.  Just different.  Let peace find you and wrap you in your knowing.

Let that still, small voice whisper to you.  We can get things done.  Together—not apart.  Let us unite and embrace, knowing a solution lies between us, only found in our synergy.  Let us hold tight and let go—all at the same time.

This moment, let it be ours—let us know that at this moment, we were true, we were brace, and we met with a great Being and Peace descended upon us all.

Connecting with Values, Daily

In the light of my last blog, my themes simple faith, simple family, and simple finances, were a direction for living a less complicated life.  Personally I hate drama and so if I create drama on my own, it just ticks me off exponentially!

 

Being on the Elizabeth (Libby) identified “home stretch” provides me with a fresh perspective and motivation I may not have had just six months ago.

 

I cannot tell you if Ray and I have been out to eat in 2015!  We just rarely do that anymore.  We consider the value with the overall health options and our decision has been to choose home over and over again.

 

Now this is a “night and day” change from our previous behavior.  But we are at the point that we prefer clean, lean, green, and we know we can achieve that at home whereas the last time we went out to eat, our bill was $8 more than usual plus it was unhealthy!  Not to mention service is always volatile.

 

Joan Chittister says “Most of us have everything we need.  Greed is the compulsion to get more because we refused to enjoy what we have” (2014, p. 180). 

 

Striving to appreciate and enjoy what you heave is an upstream swim against the American culture.  The heavy flow is pushing you towards a mentality of excess—more, bigger, better. 

 

Going against that current is a daily struggle of lifestyle choice and is aided by values clarification.  In my last post, I indicated that simple faith, simple family, and simple finances were three keys to how I am attempting to swim upstream.

 

I’ll admit, it is not easy and I have a pair of bright, yellow Sperry’s to remind me that I am flawed and make bad choices.

 

However, my goal is to stay close to my values and remind myself daily of the need to connect to those values.

Simple

We come into this world holding nothing.

We leave this world holding nothing.

Why then, do we spend so much time in the middle holding stuff that doesn’t matter?

 

If the struggle of the past three years teaches me anything, it is that simplicity is the way to live.  I’ve learned about simple faith, simple family, and simple finances.  Ultimately the common theme:  SIMPLE!  When things get complex, you better get back to the roots else misery is ahead.

 

Only two other people know the complexity of the last three years.  No real need for details other than to say different aspects of life got complicated.  One small example:  time.  Just for me, I committed to advising an organization, did an entire dissertation, and led a Bible study.  Things got hectic.  My health deteriorated and I had to make some choices to get realigned with my true values:  God & family.

 

Fast forward to today and the only thing I’m allowing is the Bible study.  It aligned with my value and allows me to share time with Ray.  So it passes the rigor test!

 

The dissertation is done and the advising has ended.  Ironically-my health is now improving!  Amazing how that works.

 

This short example is playing out in so many ways over and over again in my life right now.

 

Lesson One:  Keep faith simple.  Jesus said love God, love others.  Simple as that.  I keep myself connected (in relationship) by daily practices such as prayer and connect with others each week at church and Bible Study.  This keeps me fed and learning.

 

Lesson Two:  Sime family.  To borrow a cliché’:  focus on the family.  They are the ones who are there for you when you are down so keep those you love and those that love you close.  Reference:  love God, love others!

 

Lesson Three:  Simple finances.  Get out of debt and realize God owns and provides everything.  Not one thing is of your doing.  If you complicate things you’ll pay dearly in multiple ways!  When the finances get complicated, every other area in your life gets complicated and that just leads to misery every day!

 

Simple living-put your energies and resources where it matters (suggestion: take Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University class), simple finances, simple family, and simple faith.

 

Stand firm on that value and everything is simpler to figure out!

The Wounded Believers

 

 

Luke 10:25-37

²⁵ Just then a lawyer stood up to test Jesus.^[a] “Teacher,” he said, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” ²⁶ He said to him, “What is written in the law? What do you read there?” ²⁷ He answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.” ²⁸ And he said to him, “You have given the right answer; do this, and you will live.”

²⁹ But wanting to justify himself, he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” ³⁰ Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell into the hands of robbers, who stripped him, beat him, and went away, leaving him half dead. ³¹ Now by chance a priest was going down that road; and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side. ³² So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. ³³ But a Samaritan while traveling came near him; and when he saw him, he was moved with pity. ³⁴ He went to him and bandaged his wounds, having poured oil and wine on them. Then he put him on his own animal, brought him to an inn, and took care of him. ³⁵ The next day he took out two denarii,^[b] gave them to the innkeeper, and said, ‘Take care of him; and when I come back, I will repay you whatever more you spend.’ ³⁶ Which of these three, do you think, was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of the robbers?” ³⁷ He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” Jesus said to him, “Go and do likewise.”

 

The Wounded Believer

After reading and thinking about the parable of the Good Samaritan, I wonder several things.  I wonder who is the most wounded in this story?  Jesus of course has the right to pass judgment but instead uses this example to teach us so many things such as compassion, love, and humility.  But if we look deeper, aren’t there many Wounded Believers in this story?  And although we are wounded, is anyone absolved from their responsibility to show love and compassion to another?

 

Interestingly in Jesus’ story, both initial men who passed on the opposite side of the road so as to avoid the beaten man were men with placement and honor in God’s House.  The Priest, of course, holding a most high position in direct connection with God.  The Levite an honored member of the lineage of Levi and then comes the rigid Samaritan.  Of all three of these individuals, it is the uptight Samaritan who gets dirty in showing love, kindness, and compassion. 

 

I have been thinking about this story for abit.  One of the themes in my life has been that I’ve always told people that one incident does not a reputation make!  However it is repeated incidents which shape one’s character and reputation.

 

Ray and I have had some recent encounters with some of my previous environment colleagues and we both received very cool responses.  The responses by these high level individuals perplexed me because I didn’t do anything to them, that I can recall, which would elicit the responses received.

 

So I began to question and reflect, as I always do.  Some of my thoughts have settled upon this notion:  we are all Wounded Believers.  It is what we believe in, that differs. 

 

While I (and Ray) are more believers in values I am realizing that others are believers in persons.  Whereas Ray and I tend to stand on enduring values such as faith, compassion, and so on, we ultimately will make a decision in favor of a value over a person.  Not everyone lives their life in this manner. 

 

In light of the last two years, I realize now that some individuals were/are so aligned with a person that they will forego warmth, politeness, and caring because they feel a person has been wronged-not necessarily that a value has been violated, but a person they believed in has been wronged.

 

My thoughts are that ultimately we are all fallen people so believing in a value seems to be a more pure intention than believing in another person who may or may not be telling us the truth.

 

However I realize that for some the dichotomy was severe.  Whereas I believe my story is valid, I am able to recognize that the story lived for others is/was very different.  My story is not their story.  Sadly though, those indivdiuals cannot seem to believe that their story is not my story.  Promotions, raises, recognitions, and access to “ears” came easily for some.  Not for me.

 

So when accusations came forward one incident does not a reputation make!  So what is one accusation?  A thorough investigation (say one that takes eight weeks?) surely would have invalidated any false accusations.  A lower level investigation would have discounted my word easily saying that one person is simply disgruntled or something of the like.  Or a local investigation which did not fact check could easily stack the deck against a lowly staff member officing in a closet. 

However, when you have so many accusations that it takes you eight weeks to wade through.  Or it is public knowledge that greater than ten former accusations were filed in the two previous years…I do believe a pattern of some kind if forming.

 

At that point individuals have to choose to believe the accusations or discount the claims.  In a first round, I can see how easy it would be to discount accusations.  I too would expect to withhold judgment until a thorough investigation was conducted.

 

When second, third, and beyond accusations move forward, when we have the level of investigation that removes someone from their position for eight weeks before announcing the person is no longer available, you again have to face the question of believe or discount.

 

If you decide to discount again, then I believe you are teetering on denial.  Or maybe you feel the power is so strong you still have to keep up the show else you’re the next victim?  Even as the victims cry out?

 

Even though I have received cold treatment by the powers that now be, I still hold to the value that we are all called to “Love God and love others” and no one should shoulder blame in this situation. 

 

Honestly I followed the Matthew 18 principle in that I went and asked multiple times to be respected, to be valued, and to be useful.  When that did not work, others went on my behalf.  When that did not work and over two years had passed, I asked a neutral party to simply investigate. 

 

Should the Priest have helped the beaten man?  Yes, he should have.  However we don’t know his story.  Should the Levite have helped the beaten man?  Yes, he should have.  But again, we don’t know his story.  What we do know is that the Samaritan did help, the beaten man was shown love, compassion, kindness, and the face of God. 

 

So on my best days, I keep this in mind and realize just as I am a Wounded Believer, so too are they.  But on my worst days I am hurt and angry at them and want to shake them and say “can’t you see” as I point to the beaten man in the ditch which is my story. 

Moving from Entertainment to Engagement

Lately I have been doing focus groups with students on a topic unrelated to my dissertation.  However, I cannot help but see the connections to my work as the students share their thoughts.  First, some context from my work:

Lindholm (2007) noted that nearly half of students beginning college indicate that spiritual issues are essential or highly important to them.  Now, don’t imagine a group of students sitting around talking about Jesus-this is college remember. 

Think instead of heated debates over whether or not Texas will ever acknowledge same-sex marriage.  Or think of a thoughtful student sitting in the library supposedly working on accounting homework but daydreaming about how he will honestly live most of his work days-in the family business that he is lined up to inherit, or teaching middle-school students to play soccer which makes his heart leap in his chest with enthusiasm.

Realize also, that two-thirds of these students expect their college or university to promote their “self-understanding, prepare them for responsible citizenship, develop their personal values, and provide for emotional development” (p. 12). 

College students clearly desire spirituality and spiritual development as a part of their university experience and expect colleges and universities to provide environments that facilitate their spiritual growth.

Minasian (2010) urged the higher education community to consider implementing a more holistic environment for students “not only to gain rich academic experiences, but also to understand that values, ethics, and morals are part of that experience” (p. 3). 

Obviously Minasian believed in the importance of the academic environment, including discussions of values, ethics, and morals as important components of student growth. 

For example, in place of sterile, morally stripped discussions about the rules of finance without discussion about the moral obligations of money handling, students miss rich opportunities for dialogue about character and causes greater to enriching the self than balancing ledgers.  Higher education environments that allow morality and spirituality should not compete against those that do not.  All college environments should evolve to serve today’s students’ needs holistically.

As I have listened to these focus groups, students are craving these discussions.  Sometimes the students will mention attending a Speaker Series but what they are really, really craving is for a peer leader to facilitate respectful, authentic give and take conversations among friends.  The students are begging for someone to have meaningful dialogue with them in the residence hall.  Where has our ability to facilitate learned engagement gone? 

These students clearly have indicated a desire for these discussions over a short-term party atmosphere.  They are clear that they want nothing to interfere with their (wait for it) study time.  Not even kidding, they have been clear that they will forego a fun event to stay in their room and study.  No contest. 

So, higher education must move from an entertainment model to an engagement model.  And this change needs to come quickly!

 

REFERENCES

Lindholm, J. A. (2007, September/October). Spirituality in the academy: Reintegrating our lives and the lives of our students. About Campus, 10-17. doi:10.1002/abc.218

Minasian, S. A. (2010, November 14). Spiritual life on campus: Agreeing to disagree. Chronicle of Higher Education. Retrieved from http://chronicle.com/article/Spiritual-Life-on-Campus-/125328/